My heart told me.

• My heart said.
• Cheer up and no fear.
• Still there is a helper around, dear.
• Cry not and wiped your tears.
• Every sadness will then disappear.
• Living my thoughts so beyond my mind.
• So deep my love upon the heart sublime.
• What's gone ever cud not rewind.
• The hurts must not again counter mine.
• Lets bygone be bygone and leave it clear.
• Never again reopen your depth thy inner.
• Shoot your stars wish for another.
• Sweet & true love will perfectly do cover...
• -adz

01.13pm 22th November. Today, got a lot to talk about but it just wudn't blend well to utter in words.I felt confused.To think all way back before my marriage...Life mixed with love was so ludicrously simple as I imagine it will be.Who wudn't feel it when your heart beat tremendously & the nerves jerked shockingly as someone said those 3 magic words, I love u! But it wasn't that easy babe! For me there's so many hazard and obstacle together with a heap of ventures at stake...But I dare risk it just to hear the words...and of course apart from beeing said over and over again, I plunged into marriage life.It was a happy romantic ceremony.My way through... So it was as in fairy tales, married to a handsome prince and live happily ever after. Then the mirracle happened, like a blink of an eye,I gave birth to ten beautiful princesses and charming princes,hooked and abide by their needs and deeds.Year after year,my days were full of laughters,sweetness,in solidarity,sadness and happiness. Engulfed with loves and tendings around me. Yes, absolutely hard works bringing them up but yet utterly satisfaction overwhelmed me.I loved my husband and family. Then the expectation became wild and like a huge Twister, it spin my life and wounded my life. As 'nature' took what was already mine.He was lost to us forever!My life and career erupted over the next few years.My savings entirely gone.What am I going to do with my kids hanging & depends on me? Thats life!There are still living persons who cares.Helps poured down. Suddenly I wake up, try to sit back, then I stand and started to walk. I tried to rake in the dough... Now I'm still struggling & striving upwards for our life.By God's will and pray, I 'll survive. Still, there's completely a long way to step on if we're in a positive mind. No more turning back!